For nearly a decade, naked pumpkin runners did their thing unmolested, stampeding through the frigid dark past crowds of admirers who hooted, hollered and tossed candy. But last year the run attracted more than 150 participants, and Police Chief Mark Beckner fears things are getting out of hand. “It’s a free-for-all,” he says.

So he intends to stop it.

He will station more than 40 officers on the traditional four-block route tonight, with two SWAT teams patrolling nearby. All have orders to arrest gourd-topped streakers as sex offenders.

SWAT teams?!?

Obviously [South Carolina Republican Governor] Sanford’s affair didn’t sit well with the Family Research Council, the conservative think tank that “champions marriage and family” and sponsors the summit. But, hey, even with Sanford gone you’ll still be able to get your fair share of values voter inspiration – in the form of Rush Limbaugh, Bill O’Reilly and Pat Buchanan.

They sure did act quickly. Couldn’t hardly get him under the bus quickly enough. ROFL.

Unlike some of his colleagues, Ensign’s jeremiads against gay marriage reflected a sincere expression of his faith and personal sensibility. Indeed, Ensign is a Promise Keeper and the only Pentecostal in the Senate – former Missouri Senator and U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft was the first – and a member of a congregation in Las Vegas affiliated with the ultra-conservative International Church of the Foursquare Gospel.

These guys should have at least some shred of honesty and make it their motto: “Do as I say, not as I do.”

P.S. I phoned Senator Ensign’s office at (877) 894-7711 and suggested (in no uncertain terms) that he should resign. Damned hypocrite, going around talking like he’s so much better than everybody else and voting to keep many of us down at the level of second class citizens. His family is SO much better than certain other families, yeah, right. The man has no business holding any position of trust or authority.

The Mouse that Roared, in Iran

The home state of Senator Larry Craig doesn’t strike us as the very most auspicious locale for such a meeting. We wonder… Will they invite the esteemed former senator to participate? – he used to be such a strong champion of ‘family values’? And… Will there be misbehavior in the men’s room?

Meanwhile, here is a very interesting article from last month in the New York Times, all about the ups and downs and ins and outs of seeking Casual Sex on Craigs List.

Snicks Place is a little bitty bar a couple blocks North of the Stratosphere. You need to get buzzed in, after the bartender has a look at you through the video camera. Last year, an undercover cop made himself a Snicks regular so that, after a while, everybody would feel comfortable letting their guard (and their pants) down.

CARSON CITY, Nev. – December 31, 2008 – Nevada gambling regulators have filed a complaint against a Las Vegas gay bar that holds a slot machine license, alleging that several patrons engaged in sex acts in public areas of the bar.

The Gaming Control Board complaint filed against Snick’s Place and licensee Dominic Vitale lists seven counts, each punishable by a fine of up to $100,000. The club’s license for up to 15 slot machines also could be revoked.

“The conduct here is so over the top and out of control that it warrants swift and very definitive action,” Control Board member Sayre said Wednesday when asked about the complaint filed with the board’s parent Nevada Gaming Commission.

It looked for a while like Snicks might go under for good. But the latest news is good news.

CARSON CITY, Nev. – March 11, 2008 – Nevada gambling regulators are recommending a $50,000 fine and a 6-month suspension of a slot machine license to resolve a complaint alleging that several patrons in a Las Vegas gay bar engaged in sex acts in public areas of the bar.

The settlement signed by Snick’s Place owner Dominick Vitale and state Gaming Control Board members would resolve a 7-count complaint filed in December. Each count is punishable by a fine of up to $100,000. Also, the club’s license for up to 15 slot machines could have been revoked.

The complaint, based on observations by an undercover Control Board agent between late April and mid-June 2008, states that in one case two patrons had intercourse in a public area of the bar, and in other cases patrons were seen engaging in other sex acts.

This part is our favorite:

The various sexual activities by patrons tend to reflect “poorly on the reputation of gaming in the state of Nevada,” the complaint added.

How perfectly ridiculous. Again we have cause to wonder. What do they call it Sin City for, anyway??

In Las Vegas, they give you free liquor at the bar, the better to impair your judgment while you’re sitting there in front of a one-armed bandit built right into the bar itself, tempting you to gamble away all your money. You can drink yourself stupid and lose everything – and that is perfectly all right with the Gaming Control Board. But it’s only nudity and sex that reflect poorly on the reputation of gaming in Nevada? Does that make any sense to you??

We don’t know for sure, but we tend to doubt that any genuine patrons at Snicks Place objected to the public sex. And, in any case, if you don’t like a bar then, well, there are plenty more for you to choose among.

Silly Nevada state officials should find themselves some actual problems to get worked up about and leave people alone.